An Adventure in Ministry

This week is baby loss awareness week. It is an opportunity for people to remember those babies that didn’t make it through pregnancy or died in the early days of life. It is also a time to bring awareness to the fact that baby loss is unfortunately common, and that the grief and loss that parents feel is real, valid and something to be spoken about. As someone who has walked through infertility for 11 years, while baby loss isn’t part of my story, as a redemptive thread God has woven as part of my story of grace, I have sat with many women who have lost a precious child. I have wept with them, longed with them, prayed with them and lamented with them. It has been easy to see what a horrendous thing baby loss is and how the grief can be very isolating.  Last night I had the great privilege of speaking at our local annual service of remembrance for parents who have experienced baby loss both recently and in the past, organised by Macclesfield maternity unit and hosted at the beautif...

One of the most interesting lessons I have learnt in my 5+ years of infertility was about lament. Up until I experienced the sorrow of infertility, lament had been something I had not really paid much attention to. I thought that David in the psalms was a bit of a moaner and I had never really opened the book of Lamentations. But when I discovered lament, I found a whole new way to worship God and exercise my faith. So what is lament? In simplicity it is a prayer to God for help and it comes out of a place of intense pain and suffering.  In my opinion it seems to be a forgotten form of worship, with Christians often believing that by acknowledging pain and hurt they are somehow being a bad Christian. However lament has a string biblical presence. Over 1/3 of the psalms are psalm of lament, many of the prophets lamented, (especially Jeremiah) and Job lamented over his situation. There is even a book of lament aptly named Lamentations. Interestingly Jesus too had moments of ...

I have seen lots of posts on social media recently about finding your tribe, posts like this one: Being completely honest it has challenged me. Through our four and a half year journey through infertility I have lost many friends, distancing myself from people in order to numb the pain, hiding behind the shame that I may never be ‘good enough  to be a mum’ rather  than being vulnerable with the people who knew me best. I’m sure many people in similar situations can identify. However… Recently God has been really speaking to me about community and has started to point out to me exactly who my ‘tribe’ is.  1 Corinthians 12:25-26 (the passion translation) says: 'He has done this intentionally so that every member would look after the others with mutual concern, and so that there will be no division in the body. In that way, whatever happens to one member happens to all. If one suffers, everyone suffers. If one is honoured, everyone rejoices.' ...

Over the past five weeks, as I have been recovering from my broken ankle, I have Spent an awful lot of time on my own. My husband has taken over the running of the house and the running of the church along as caring for his sometimes grumpy wife, so in reality he has very little time to entertain me!!  Through my recovery there have been times of bliss as God has drawn close to me and I have got to know him better.  There have been times of great excitement as God has birthed dreams in me to bless many. However There has been time of frustration when I just can’t get up and do something simple like make a cup of coffee. There has been times when I have felt Completely and utterly alone.  If I’m really honest there have been times when I have battled with feeling of unworthiness and misery. Psalm 13 1-2 seems to sum up what I have felt at my worst!   “How long, LORD? Will you forget me forever?  How long will you hide your face fr...